I identify with this woman and her journey with
her daughter. (See link at the bottom of the page.) I was one of those
judgmental people, who blamed ADHD on bad parenting and what have you. Until I
was blessed, yes that is right, blessed with an incredible, intelligent, sweet,
curious boy...with ADHD. And just like woman in the story, we picked up on his
gifts, yes gifts, early on. Here was a bright boy with a nearly gifted IQ, who
was unable to succeed at school, struggled with appropriate behavior with
friends and family. He had repetitive verbalizations, interrupting constantly, fidgeting,
zero ability to concentrate, and impulsive behavior. (I have plenty of exposer
to other children, so I know the difference between “normal boy” stuff, and what
it looks like to be ADHD)But he was smart! And intuitive, artistic, empathetic, and FUNNY! The type of funny you have to be smart for. He NEVER gave up.
After years of struggling to keep up, testing with specialists
and doctors, multiple diagnoses of Dyslexia, ADHD, and a vision disorder too complicated to explain, I was
resigned that school was always going to be a huge challenge. I spent countless
hours tutoring him with an expensive reading program, volunteered at the
school, and took him to vision therapy, which was also hugely expensive. I find it noteworthy that none of these
interventions were covered by insurance. Finally as a last resort, and not without
hesitation, we started him on medication.
We waited a full year before getting a prescription because
of the negative stigma attached. The
idea that parents throw their kids on medication as an easy-out is quite
simply untrue. But it got to the point he was barely keeping up, there were daily
tears and frustration (his and mine) trying to complete the simplest
assignments, things that should have been easy.
When he started his meds...the change was amazing. He is so proud
of his success at school now, he bursts through the door 90% of the time either
having done his homework already or excited to do it. He gets happy little notes on his
work from his teacher. And today, he was awarded top in class for WRITING! One
of the most difficult things for him to do. And he also received a “Most
Improved” award. I am so very proud of
him, and it brings me to tears to see the pride on his face. This little boy is a brilliant gift to me and has many many brilliant gifts to share.
So if anyone wants to judge anyone else for the decisions
they make to help their children have the success they deserve, stop and
educate yourself.
Are there problems with our education system? Definitively
yes. Are there natural interventions? Of course and we use them as much as
possible, diet, nature walks, and focused time doing things he enjoys. (Lately
it’s cooking.) But to discount the benefits of ADHD medication, or worse,
discount the existence of ADHD altogether, is only increasing the stigma, and
making the struggle of these children (and adults) that much more
difficult.
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